A new chapter...

I always knew that I would stay home when my children arrived. In my opinion, it is one of the best things that you can do for your kids. Being able to do it though isn't always an option.

When I was pregnant with Dillon, Kevin and I talked about the logistics of me staying home, especially about the loss of the income. It was a very difficult decision and took a leap of faith, but we knew that I needed to be at home.

I was able to figure out a schedule where I could work about 12 hours a week: 6 hours at home, 6 hours in office. I could spend most of my time with Dillon, and still be able to work a little. Plus, Wednesdays were Kevin's day off, and he could spend a few hours alone with D. Then after about a year, I was no longer needed at work. I was home full time.

I have been home full time for almost 7 years. Most of the time it is fabulous! I have free time with the kids, time for the housework, time for me! But it's not always good.

Yes, I absolutely love the freedom. Not being tied down. Being able to help out at Dillon's school, Bailey's school, at my church, has helped me stay busy. But, it also makes me more prone to depression.

Time alone, time on the computer, napping, eating. Not good.

Last Spring, while I was pregnant with Avery, I was offered an opportunity to help out at the preschool at my church. Being that I originally went to college to study working with this age child, I took the job. I was working as a long term sub, while another teacher took classes in the mornings. I was able to go in every day and work for 3 hours or so. If it was Bailey's day for school, she went to her school. If not, she came with me. It was perfect! I have been helping them out ever since, just not on such a regular schedule. Now it is more like here and there, when they need me. It truly renewed my love of working with children! And it helped stave off any depression during the pregnancy. I was happy.

Now I am wanting more. I had the opportunity earlier in this school year to apply for a job at Dillon's school. I thought long and hard about it. Kindergarten. Short term fill in for a maternity leave. It was the perfect thing for me, but I had Avery. Was I willing to put her in daycare? Was I willing to lose her first year? Was I willing to give up nursing? No, no, and no. I need to wait.

Now I have decided to go forward and apply for a part time postion for the next school year. Avery will be one, and not full time nursing anymore. I will still lose out on being with her during the mornings, but I think I need to take the chance. Plus, it is not a given that I will be offered a position. I would be just as happy to work as a "perferred sub." But I am going for the Kindergarten position.

So I have been working on my application. Redoing my resume'. Working on a Personal Statement. And I have a "job coach." My little sister. I write up a beginning resume et al, and she looks over it, makes suggestions in purple font with little "Robynisms" like, "Yo", and "blah blah". I make changes, and she rereads it. I think we are even getting close to being done.

I am excited, but really scared. I know that this is something that I would be GREAT at! It is just getting back in the saddle that is really hard.

Thank you Bob for helping me. Who knew little sisters knew so much?